People have several turning points in their life. Have you passed that already? Now that I think about it, I have a big turning point in my life… The word LGBTQ has become established worldwide now. I wonder how many people understand the word and the people. First of all, what does LGBTQ stand for? Lesbian A lesbian is a female homosexual: a female who experiences romantic love or sexual attraction to other females. Gay Gay is a term that primarily refers to a homosexual person or the trait of being homosexual. Gay is often used to describe homosexual males but lesbians may also be referred to as gay. Bisexual Bisexuality is romantic attraction, sexual attraction or sexual behaviour toward both males and females, or romantic or sexual attraction to people of any sex or gender identity; this latter aspect is sometimes termed pansexuality. Transgender Transgender is an umbrella term for people whose gender identity differs from what is typically associated with the sex they were assigned at birth. It is sometimes abbreviated to trans. Queer Queer is an umbrella term for sexual and gender minorities that are not heterosexual or cisgender. Queer was originally used pejoratively against those with same-sex desires but, beginning in the late-1980s, queer scholars and activists began to reclaim the word. Questioning The questioning of one’s gender, sexual identity, sexual orientation, or all three is a process of exploration by people who may be unsure, still exploring, and concerned about applying a social label to themselves for various reasons. These information from https://ok2bme.ca/resources/kids-teens/what-does-lgbtq-mean/. If you want to know more about LGBTQ→https://www.wearefamilycharleston.org/lgbt-a-z-glossary/. The reason I am introducing this word is because I am part of the LGBTQ community. I am Transgender. I didn't like my body and voice becoming a girl since I was a child. My body sex is a girl, but my mind sex is a boy, so I am romantically interested in girls. Sometime people think that that is the same as lesbian, because I become like girl as girl's body, but it's totally different. When I was in junior high school, I belonged to the girl 's basketball team. We tell all of things to each other, trusting, going out together, sleepover at weekend, they were unmistakably my best friends. At that time, I fell in love with a girl on the same team. I had no odd feelings that I liked that girl; I didn't even try to hide it. As time goes by, everyone in the team knew that fact. And they began to ignore me and began to do malicious bullying. I didn't know why I was being bullied. Because I fell in love with girl? I wondered at that time, why can’t I fall in love with a girl? Just my body sex is girl, but my mind sex is boy. Is that only reason they bullying me? If so, what is the reason for bullying? If I fell in love with a girl in the form of a girl, did they think that I will become a monster at night or I suddenly lose myself and begin to hurt them? What makes you feel hatred for those people who do not match the mind sex and body sex? Can friendship relations be broken so easily? I couldn’t stop thinking those doubts. From this time I began to think about what is "Real friends". Now that I think about it , that event was definitely a turning point in my life. Every turning point may not be pleasing for your life, but you can definitely change it to a wonderful one. There is no need only one turning point. If you reach the worst turning point, next time you can strive to reach the best turning point. Now, I don't think I have many friends. I never thought of it as embarrassing. Because I can call them my best friend(or real friend) with confidence. My home mother often says this, "There is no need to be can normal person. It's too boring. I like weird. I like the person who are different from other people rather than normal people". Perhaps she may have said this unconsciously, but I have been saved many times in these words. I don't know the definition of real friend. I don’t even want to look for it. No matter how serious, painful or pitiful it is, I call the person real friend who tries to understand and stay with me.
My lesson for you: ・It is better to have fewer real friends than many fake friends. ・People who "just" hang out with you might not be real friends. ・People who fully understand you are rare and precious. Kai I
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“Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice." -Steve Jobs I never liked dresses, dolls, ballet classes or what little girls are supposedly supposed to like or do. I have always played multiple sports, been a total book nerd, lived in jeans and the extent of my dancing is swaying side to side snapping or sometimes spontaneous square dancing with anybody who’s unfortunate enough to be around me. So naturally, life has served me plenty of identity crisis moments and I’m sure there will be a copious amount to come in the future. The first minor identity crisis was when I was 13 years old. Let me set the scene. It was the end of grade 7 and the graduating class of 2015 was celebrating our completion of elementary school and the upcoming progression to high school. I remember asking all the girls what they were going to wear to the awards ceremony and the dance; dresses or pretty skirts were described, accompanied with cute shoes and maybe a purse. I didn’t own a dress, nor did I have a skirt or purse. At this point my life I was at the peak of my Adidas warm-up pants/runners/athletic shirt combo and wouldn’t have been caught dead in any kind of shoes other than converse or runners. The dance was of course fancy dress but I had pleaded with my mum multiple times over the course of weeks if I could wear jeans and a nice top. Long story short I ended up wearing a dress. I remember crying on the way to the ceremony and hating every time I had to cross my legs because of the stupid flowery dress. I felt ugly and sad because I didn’t feel comfortable and didn’t want to wear what everyone else was wearing. The Merriam-Webster dictionary’s definition of identity crisis is “personal psychosocial conflict especially in adolescence that involves confusion about one’s role and often a sense of loss of continuity to one’s personality”. Most people experience their first identity crisis in their teens generally revolving around their personality, social status, gender role physical appearance and many other things. Personally, my identity crisis was that I was so confused about why I was so different to kids my age, I never wanted to talk about it so I stayed quiet about my feeling of isolation and continued on with my life. For a long time I wanted to pretend to be someone I wasn't in order to fit in and I was having a lot of trouble with my identity. Flash forward to now and I’m happy and comfortable with my quirky personality and I like being different. Here is a website that I remember reading and sometimes I look back at if I just to check in with myself. It's important to know that going through a period in your life where you are uncertain of yourself, your worth or your identity is normal, but it's also important find help concerning your situation. Here are some tips for dealing with an identity crisis, especially during adolescence.
I regret not opening up sooner about my state of very low self-esteem, because I’m sure that talking to somebody would have helped me feel less alone. And so, if you don’t like dresses, dolls or ballet classes then that’s ok, just figure out what you do like and love yourself unconditionally.
Georgia F Stage One of Acceptance This is the honest truth about people leaving your life that you didn’t expect to leave. Sixteen year old me likes to act like I have all this experience and know all about heartbreak, but let’s be honest, I will have a lot more of it in my lifetime. Heartbreak doesn’t always come from relationship breakups, it can come from friendship breakups too. In my highschool experience, many people have come and gone from my life that I never would have expected. I once read a quote that said “If you’re not losing friends then you’re not growing up.” Losing a friend is very hard to put into perspective since they were a person that you thought was going to evolve with you. In time, you will realize is that people come into your life to teach you valuable lessons about yourself and they were just meant for that chapter of your life. Sometimes turning the page to the next chapter can be really difficult, finally letting it go. When I’m in the denial stage of my loss friendship, I remind myself of this quote, “You can’t start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading the last one.” Currently in my life I just lost a girl I considered a sister to me. All of a sudden she started to act like I was invisible, completely cutting me out of her life. Since I can be stubborn and was tired of always being the one to fight for the friendship, I decided not to do anything. My best advice for being okay with a best friend breakup is that they were in that chapter of your life for a reason. So give yourself peace of mind, keep yourself busy, don’t stalk them on social media, and most importantly don’t say bad things about them behind their back. Don’t talk behind someones back just because you are upset and angry at them, be the bigger person. Stage two of New Life Now that you have started the next chapter, appreciate the good times with them. Sing along to the songs that remind you of them, look at the memories you made together in photos, know that everything happens for a reason, and what’s meant to be in your life will be. Don’t forget to carry on with your life and try new things you didn’t think you would’ve experienced before. Remember the best revenge is showing them your life is getting better now that they are gone. Here are 10 tips for a fresh start:
BY ELLA M |
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